On Thursday, we presented the statistics of divorce rate in
some parts of the world and Nigeria. Then we asked what you think the
leading cause of divorce could be. We asked if it could be issues
relating to money, compatibility or sex. We further asked you to tell
us what else you think could be responsible.
Compatibility, came out tops as the cause of divorce as
44.2 percent
of our respondents hold that the two parties entering the marriage
contract are mostly blinded by ‘love’ and they only get to see that they
are not compatible soon after sealing the deal. Money came in next,
other issues third and sex came in as the least reason for divorce.
A dictionary defines compatibility as the capability [of people] to
exist or live together in harmony. No wonder many respondents hammer on
it with different explanations to back their stand up.
“Many don’t take time to understand each other before they get
married. so, they have problems when the realities sets in soon
afterwards and eventually divorce when they could not be patient enough
to work things out,” a respondent said.
“Compatibility is the main issue because inability to make the
required adjustments and changes when people become married is what
makes them turn down their earlier declaration of the union. In
compatibility is mutual: respect, trust, selflessness, appreciation,
dedication, fortitude and alliance to make marriage a huge success,” another respondent said.
“Most people move into marriage based on initial sentimental and
not -so – true behaviours. Time brings out the truth in the character
and personality of the partners. Often the compatibility issues present
themselves at this point. As a remedy, I suggest that truth and
sincerity would help,” another respondent said.
Some even hold that compatibility covers everything, “
Yes,
because compatibility encompasses sex and money. If we are compatible
sex won’t be an issue and financial issue will be brought under
control.”A respondent said.
Money came in second at
26.4 percent.
“Our poverty entrenched society creates all sorts of misnomer,
thus affecting peoples sense of virtue and values, this affects marriage
adversely,” one correspondent said.
“The economy is becoming harder and people are finding it very
difficult to make ends meet and to be able to look out for each other,
the wages are shrinking and making people to think more of themselves
only …,” another said.
“Economic wellbeing of a couple is determined largely by
financial capability of both partners and either one of the couple.
Whenever this is lacking, anyone of the partners that feels most
uncomfortable would tend to be tired of the relationship. He/she may
decide to walk out of the relationship. Thus economic factor plays a
major role in the stability of homes.
Other issues came in third at
17.9 percent.
Surprisingly, many respondents choosing the ‘others’ option say
feminism and gender equality are responsible for divorce. Some of them
say feminism snuffs out the life in humility and that starts the end of
the marriage.
The growing desire of women to be independent. High social
profile of the women folk has absolutely made many of them to question
the age long tradition of head ship of the man in the family. While
modern time has watered down the maximum ruler ship of the man,
democracy is the bane of our age. Imposition of self by woman, maybe
because of financial power, over the man, is totally unAfrican and in
fact to the healthy growth of the family in any clime,” a respondent said.
And one respondent suggested having breaks because of the ‘burden of continuous living together…’
“I have been married for 8 years and can say it may not be any of
the aforementioned reasons though I think lack of Money can contribute
to it. In my opinion it has to do with the burden of continuous living
together without a break. Marriage takes freedom away from both man and
woman and after some times this could have negative impact on their
marriage. My advise or suggestion is that Man and Woman should take a
regular break e.g. one month every 2 years from each other.”
Only a mere 11.4 percent of all respondents said sex was capable of leading to divorce.
“
It is sex because it is meant to be enjoyed by a man and his
wife. If either of them, especially the man, is not satisfied he may
begin to pick up unnecessary quarrel with his wife but unwilling to talk
about it in the public. He may then begin to engage in extra-marital
affairs. Besides, no woman can keep or maintain a relationship with a
man without sex, period,” a respondent said.
Title : Sex is the least cause of divorce − Poll
Description : On Thursday, we presented the statistics of divorce rate in some parts of the world and Nigeria. Then we asked what you think the leading...
